I Don’t Want to Go Back”: How to Help Teens Beat Back-to-School Blues

“I am not looking forward to going back in.”

That’s what three different students told me last week during our coaching sessions.

When I asked John, a Junior Cert student with ADHD, why he felt this way, he didn’t hesitate:

• “All that work.”
• “Getting up early.”
• “Having to do homework.”
• “Sitting tests and exams.”

To be honest, even I felt a little deflated after hearing him put it so clearly.

It reminded me of another student I coached a few years ago—let’s call her Caitríona.

She was heading into 6th year and said, in her own words, that she “hated” school.

Her parents tried everything: making her breakfast, talking gently, even chauffeuring her to and from school. But one morning, as her dad pulled up at the school gates, she burst into tears:

“Let’s just drive to the Dublin mountains Dad. Anywhere but school.”

When I asked her why she hated it so much, she didn’t hold back:

“Everyone talks about mental health and wellbeing—but what does that even mean? I missed two days last week and not one teacher asked how I was. They just kept banging on about exams and essays.”

She had a point.

So I listened. I validated her feelings:

“School must feel really hard for you. And I understand why you’re upset.”

Later, using some psychometric tools, I discovered Caitríona had incredible empathy and a real need for harmony. School clashed with both. But once she understood that, and we built a tailored plan together, everything shifted.

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So what can you do if your teen starts resisting school?

Here are 5 practical things that make a big difference when it comes to the Back-to-School Blues:

1. Build an evening routine – The secret to getting up in the morning starts the night before. Encourage wind-down habits (screens off, downtime, prep for tomorrow).
2. Validate their feelings – Listen first. They don’t need fixing, they need to feel heard.
3. Focus on behaviour, not mood – They may not feel like it, but showing up builds resilience.
4. Verbalise their strengths – Remind them of what they’re good at and how they’ve overcome challenges before.
5. Give them hope – Acknowledge the struggle, but highlight the light at the end of the tunnel.

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A School Run Script You Can Use

“Caitríona, I just want to say I admire you. I know school isn’t easy for you, but I love the way you keep going in. After you get through this year, you’ll be able to do anything you want. It gets easier after this.”

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Here’s the truth: school can be incredibly tough for many teens. But that’s also where resilience is built.

Your role as a parent isn’t to shield them from every challenge—it’s to walk beside them and help them cope when times are hard.

Win the first week, and you can win the year.